We all know that language evolves, and that’s fine: it’s a living entity. We might have different levels of ease with letting go of old friends, and getting on board with new ones (I’ll admit, it took me a few years to begrudgingly accept texted). However, there are things that make me apoplectic, and effluent language is one of them.
Corporate bullshit makes me want to gouge my eyes out with a plastic spoon.
People who value clear communication abhor it, and yet the Bullshiteers (rhymes with Mouseketeers) continue making up even more, as if it will impress someone. Isn’t being out of touch with reality a sign of psychosis? Why isn’t the continued use of this feculence considered diagnostic?
There are several corporate bullshit generators, but this one is my favorite.
Give it a try!
Excuse me: Seamlessly leverage cross-functional evacuative throughput.
Feel free to deposit in the comments the dangerous dreck you’ve had the misfortune of hearing, along with a plain language translation—if you happen to know what it is supposed to mean.
We will all light a candle. Wait. Nope. That’s hazardous, as any ten-year-old with an audience and a lighter well knows. We’ll have a group scream though.
Thanks for farting around with us at the Verbihund Café!
Ways to support writing as a livelihood; each one is appreciated!
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Bullshiteers! Love it!
How fitting that Scott Adams' Dilbert should appear on the masthead of the bullshit generator. For seemingly decades while working in a science and engineering environment I received confirmation on a daily basis that Dilbert was a fellow employee at my firm.
But one does not need a bullshit generator to produce bullshit: The fossil fuel industry does it every day in their greenwashing, climate change denying TV commercials.
Awesome. I'll check it out. In the meantime, I thought you'd enjoy this ...
https://youtube.com/shorts/YagJntnUda8?si=EM4AtuKNVVGyhRNr